nothing is broken

Title: Nothing is Broken
Author(s): oannapantso
Rating: pg-13 [...kind of.]
Pairings: Homin ; bestfriend!Jaemin ; some Yoosu
Warnings: Angst galore? Some cussing at the end. Not much, though.
Summary: Changmin is smart and steady. Yunho is the prideful leader. It wasn't meant to last, though, and both of them should have known it. When it ends, though, they'll both be fine... right?
Disclaimer. I own nothing. This fic belongs to oannapantso @ http://community.livejournal.com/homin_yongwonhi/230361.html#cutid1

"Changmin. I won't do this anymore."

"What?" The response was full of mirth, the younger boy still laughing from his position on the couch, impossibly long legs folded. The joke had probably been targeting Yunho. The joke had almost definitely been one of the younger's own snarky ones, given the fact that it was spurring so much laughter. But Yunho wouldn't remember; he had lost track of all of that when he heard the tone drop, so suddenly, in disbelief. Changmin ammended himself almost immediately. "Wh-what?"

Yunho shook his head, if such a small movement could even be counted. Still, as small as it was, Changmin could probably have heard it-- the room was simply that silent. Even the television set was suddenly muted-- It almost hurt to realize that Changmin was the one with the remote. Of all the times to pay attention, the younger boy had to choose now. He was actually listening, for once, waiting for explanations and excuses that Yunho couldn't bring himself to voice.

It wasn't that there was anything wrong, really, right? Just him and Min, Min and Yunho, together. Just having to sneak around behind the rest of the group. Just pretending like this was a normal relationship between a hyung and his dongsaeng. Just this lust that kept creeping in to bring awkwardness into their everyday lives. Nothing wrong at all.

Obviously.

While Yunho was thinking about all of this, trying to come up with a better way to put it, Changmin was looking down at him. For a moment, the emotion in his dark eyes showed betrayal, shock... everything that would've been considered bad by the general population. But then, like a dropped shade, the mask went down, hiding anything at all that Yunho would've wanted or needed or expected to see. "Okay." Changmin said suddenly, easily, smiling coldly and picking up the remote once more.

Yunho could've sworn that Changmin's thumb was stuck on the volume button, as the noise just continued to grow louder as he left the room.

---

Everyone was doing amazing. Their dance steps were impeccable, they all hit the right notes. Changmin and Jaejoong were keeping their one-touch to a minimum. Yoochun seemed to have been keeping the grease out of his diet. And Junsu... Well, Junsu was his same, cute, dolphin self. No leader could have been as proud as Yunho was of his TVXQ, this group whose hard work was clearly paying off.

For the most part, anyway.

You love it when I play your game
Work that brain, I'm in your aim
Yeah, I'm in your aim
You know you got it...
You know you got it...YOU KNOW YOU GOT IT...?!
"Changmin!"

Yunho's voice seemed to bring Changmin back from whatever dream world he'd been, apparently, dazing off into. It wasn't often that Changmin screwed up this part, to be honest. It wasn't often that Changmin screwed up that much at all, really. So why was today so different? Yunho couldn't be sure (though the sinking feeling in his gut should have given him a hint) but he was less than pleased.

Yunho shook his head, sighing as Changmin gave him a more apologetic version as the cold smile from the previous week. Changmin seemed to be on a mission impossible of his own that past week: Mission Avoid-Yunho-As-Well-As-Possible. For most people, it would've been pretty hard to do, especially since Changmin had been sharing a room with Yunho. But most people weren't the same persuasive, snarky, irritating kind that Changmin was, and somehow, he was now rooming with no one at all. There was Junsu and Yoochun in one room-- however that worked-- and, from what he knew, Max was now sleeping in the bed previously owned and operated by Micky, across the room from Hero. To be completely frank... Changmin seemed to be an expert at avoidance.

"You three keep going." Yunho said, still shaking his head, and gesturing for Yoochun, Junsu, and Jaejoong to continue with the Mirotic practice. "I need to talk to you, Changmin." He sighed a little bit, knowing exactly how well this was going to go. As a leader, Yunho had to take care of all of the members... even if sometimes he didn't want to, and even if sometimes, those members made it particularly difficult.

"What?" The tall boy's voice sounded exasperated as Yunho shut the door that led out into the hallway behind them. It was obvious that he would rather do anything than be out here with Yunho. Yes, his face was still guarded, but the way that Changmin was fidgeting, pulling at his sleeves, crossing and uncrossing his arms... This wasn't a comfortable meeting for either of them.

"What's going on with you, Changmin?" The tone of his voice, in itself, demanded an answer.

I love you, I miss you, I can't concentrate without y-- Wait, what? Was Yunho going delusional, imagining those words coming out of Changmin's mouth? Sometimes he had to remind himself that it was his fault that all of this was over. But that was behind them now. It was over, there was no bringing it back, and Changmin was giving him an answer.

"I think I'm coming down with something?" Changmin shrugged half-heartedly. It wasn't exactly the answer that Yunho had expected or wanted, and not a good excuse, either-- Changmin was pretty infamous among them for being the most determined to practice, illness or injury aside. "Besides, I didn't get enough sleep last night. Yoochun and Junsu were being loud." What that was supposed to mean, Yunho didn't know, but he could guess from the sudden smirk on Changmin's face that he didn't want to know the details.

It took him a moment to respond. "Alright, I'll talk to them." Yunho said, despite the fact that it wasn't something he wanted to talk to them about at all. He ran a hand through his disheveled hair, sighing again. "Just try and concentrate, Min." There was a dangerous flash in Changmin's eyes at the nickname, though both of them knew that Yunho had meant nothing by it. After a split second, though, it was gone.

But so was Changmin, his heels disappearing behind the door.

---

"Not tonight, Jae."

"Oh, come on, Min, what's up?"

"Nothing. Just, not tonight." Max looked up at the other boy, squinching his eyes as he rubbed the side of his head. It hurt a little bit from the impact of the pillow in Hero's hand... But for once, Changmin didn't feel the need (or maybe, the drive) to retaliate. The day had worn the boy out totally and completely-- not so much the practice, but there had been so much unwanted Yunho-contact. Like Changmin wasn't already going crazy, absolutely crazy. He didn't need that right now. For all he knew, it could inflict serious damage on his mental health.

"Ma~ax." Jaejoong whined a little bit, feminine lips turned down in a pout. The pillow dropped from his hands onto his own bed, and he took up a perch on the edge of Changmin's, looking the (much) taller boy straight in the face. His head tilted a little bit to the side-- this past few weeks, even he hadn't been able to read the youngest. "Come on. What's wrong?"

"N-Nothing, Jae." Changmin shook his head stubbornly. But, at the same time, he was adjusting his position, sitting up and pulling his knees to his chest. The quiver in his voice and the look on his face had Jaejoong thinking that it was a lot more than nothing. It didn't even take too much more pestering before Changmin was breaking down and telling him everything.

Of all the people who could get Changmin to talk... No one would've guessed that the best at it was the one who beat him the most.

---

At breakfast the next morning, two of them were wide-awake, alert, and raring to go. The other three, though, were red-eyed and anything but.

"Did you see his face? It was like he saw a ghost!" Yoochun was laughing, animatedly talking with his hands across the table as Junsu all but snorted into his rice. The pair seemed to be completely unresponsive to the gloomy mood of the rest of the table. Their chatter was relentless, and Changmin found himself rubbing his eyes with tired palms, wishing he could block them out.

Jaejoong reached out and grabbed one of the other boy's wrists, pulling his hand away from his eyes and forcing Changmin to look at him. He nodded once, with a murmur that was quiet to the point of near obscurity. "Remember, Changmin." Yes, Max remembered, actually. He knew how he was supposed to act. He knew how he was supposed to look, to talk, to be. He knew even what he was supposed to think. Jaejoong had told him that it would get him there, eventually. That was all Max needed. But he couldn't do it this early.

Still, he nodded back, shoulders slumping a little bit. The chopsticks were raising to his mouth at a painfully slow rate-- Changmin, definitely the biggest eater of the group, just wasn't hungry. And neither was Yunho, at the other end of the table, eyes downcast and worried. Nobody but Hero noticed the similarity between the two boys-- Not surprising, seeing as they weren't looking at each other, doing their best to avoid each other's eyes, and Yoochun and Junsu only had eyes for one another.

How screwed up was this, anyway?

---

"I'm so fucking fine, Yunho, thanks for really giving a shit." Changmin's eyes might as well have been the pits of hell, for all they were burning. Yunho didn't think he'd ever seen the other boy this angry. Just because he'd asked a simple, tired question. Just a simple 'How are you?'. A good or a bad or just an 'okay' would've been fine with him, but obviously simplicity wasn't Changmin's thing.

"What the hell is your problem, Changmin?" Yunho took a step backwards, like he was afraid, though it was apparent that his anger was rising along with Changmin's. Their voices were raising by the moment-- chances were, anyone listening at a door didn't even need to anymore, the echo of their emotion was too loud for that.

Changmin couldn't believe this. How was he? The nerve of the thing. To Jaejoong it had been obvious. To Micky, it was eventually clear. Hell, even Junsu, that oblivious thing, had noticed eventually and asked him about it. At this point, it was apparently only Yunho that had no idea what he'd done to The Fighting Spirit of Shim Changmin, and there was nothing that could have made Max more furious.

"What the hell is my problem?" The sound of his hand colliding with Yunho's cheek had almost the same volume as Max's voice, loud and unwielding. Yunho's facial expression was of shock. "Where do you get off, Yunho, asking me how I am? What are you, King of the Rose-Colored Glasses?" Changmin's face was disgust, disgust, disgust. He couldn't believe this.

"Max, I--" Yunho was interrupted by the same burning on the opposite cheek.

"You what, Yunho?" When had there been tears in his eyes? Changmin hadn't realized they existed until they went dripping down his cheekbones. His voice didn't yield because of them though, and he kept going. "You fucking broke my heart, okay? Does that make you happy? I'm terrible, alright, even Dolphin Boy noticed! I miss you, okay, are you happy? I can't get over you, trust me, I tried. So don't fucking try and tell me that there's something wrong with me." By this time, Max was sobbing, but he was determined not to come out the loser of this. Not to be the one left behind to pick up his own pieces again. He couldn't do it in the first place. He couldn't do it again.

Suddenly, though, the warmth of another hand was on top of his, where it had stayed against Yunho's cheek. "I'm sorry, Max, I'm sorry." The voice was a whisper, and even though Changmin couldn't see through the tears to see whose it was, he didn't need to see to know whose arms were wrapping around him, pulling him in. He didn't need to see to know whose lips were suddenly pressed to his, he didn't need to see to know whose words were being spoken.

"I missed you, too."